Linkup Goal System

Seeing others without filters
1	Privacy setting: public - any Linkup member may view this goal
2	Importance of this goal: 10
3	Why is this goal important?
Without it real connection - which I value almost above all else - is impossible and I will never have the closeness I seek and the comfort and excitement that brings.
4	How is this goal related to the larger meaning and purpose of your life?
Without achieving this goal I may not enjoy life enough to want to continue live. It is therefore essential to any and all purposes I may have. To date the meaning of my life has been to understand and alleviate the causes of suffering. Disconnection is one major cause of suffering and I am currently struggling to solve this for myself.
5	What will achieving this goal will accomplish for you and for your life?
It will allow me to be who I really am and to allow others the same when they are with me.
6	What other positive developments might come about through achieving this goal?
I would learn about the nature of filters of human perception, what purpose they serve and how they can be removed. This would allow me to help my patients remove the filters with which they perceive and also facilitate this for others who read my writings or attend my lectures and workshops. More connectedness and less violence - boith to the self and to others - should be the result.
7	Describe in detail how you believe you will feel once you have achieved this goal.
Excited and relieved.
8	Describe in detail every way you believe your life will be better once you achieve this goal.
I will have close friends. I will have an intimate relationship. My body will be healthier and more relaxed. I will have more energy. I will feel safer to love.
9	In what ways will achieving this goal increase your self-respect?
I will become more of the kind of person I like - someone who lives in the present with her entire being.
10	In what ways will your achieving this goal help other people?
I've already written about this. It will enable me to help people heal more deeply and connect more easily.
11	In what ways will achieving this goal help you in achieving other goals, or making other changes?
If I see people as they are and not as I wish them to be or are afraid they might be based on my history I will be able to find the kind of companionship that is missing in my life. Eventually I might be able to have a community of people who also see others clearly.
12	If you don't achieve this goal, how will you feel about yourself?
Disappointed - but determined to keep trying.
13	If you don't achieve this goal, describe the very worst that could happen, by the end of your life.
I could be alone and despairing.
14	How challenging is this goal? 10
15	In what ways is this goal challenging?
It requires constant vigilance around monitoring when I am present, when I am emotionally defended and when I am in shock. Then it requires the scary work of continually putting aside my defenses once I become aware of them and pulling myself out of shock.
16	Describe exactly what will be involved in achieving this goal.
Putting myself in a variety of social situations. Being aware of what I am thinking and feeling before I meet people and at the moment first encounter them. Checking in with my mind and my body to see how relaxed and present I am and, if I'm not, working to bring myself back. Sometimes this will involve shifting energy from one tissue plane to another in my body or running the energy at a right angle to the direction in which it is moving. When I sense that I'm not seeing people clearly fessing up to this and telling them what is going on with me and what I sense the barriers inside me to connection to be.
17	Exactly how will you know that you are making progress toward achieving this goal?
There are more people I find myself interested in. The people with whom I want to be want to be with me.
18	How do you plan to pace yourself?
I plan to do this intensely, every day, without pause if I can.
19	What obstacles are you likely to encounter as you move toward this goal?
My own fear of what will happen to me if people see that I am seeing them claerly.
20	For each obstacle, how do you plan to deal effectively with that obstacle?
Breathe deeply, take time out if I can to lie down and go back to the root causes of the fear.
21	If you notice you are slipping, what effective action will you take?
I'll ask someone I trust to come to social events with me so I can discuss my process with them while I'm involved in it.
22	Is there a reward you plan to give yourself when you achieve this goal? If so, describe the reward and how you will feel about receiving it.
No, the goal itself is sufficient reward.
23	How long do you expect it to take, realistically, to achieve this goal?
24	Time you intend to spend toward achiveing this goal: 5 hours per day